There’s every reason to believe a movie about Tom Brady would, well, kinda suck.
But hey, it’s still kinda fun to talk about.
The New England Patriots quarterback fielded questions from California firefighters Monday night during his weekly appearance on Westwood One radio. At one point, Brady was asked who he’d like to see portray him in a potential movie.
If you’ve been following Brady at all over the last few years, then his answer shouldn’t surprise you.
“I’m going with Mark Wahlberg,” Brady said. “A Boston legend, (from) Dorchester, one of the just ‘grind it out’ kind of guys.”
Now, we understand that everyone, including Brady, seems to love Mark Wahlberg. He’s from Boston, he’s good-looking, he’s in like a million movies, yadda yadda yadda.
However, we have a bone to pick.
If by “grind it out kind of guy” he means an objectively terrible person, at least when he was young, then OK.
For those unaware, here’s Wahlberg’s rap sheet as a teenager, as outlined in a 2014 article on The Daily Beast’s website:
— Drug dealer.
— Multiple instances of being violent and racist toward African-Americans.
— Beat up a Vietnamese man, whom he also yelled racial slurs at.
— While fleeing a crime scene, he punched a man in the eye, rendering him partially blind.
— Charged with attempted murder and sentenced to two years in prison but served just 45 days.
Wahlberg found God in prison, and he since has turned his life around. And that’s great. But we’re still not ready to say he deserves to portray the greatest quarterback of all time.
Since playing the iconic Sgt. Dignam in “The Departed” in 2006, Wahlberg’s movie career has dramatically increased in quantity but sharply fallen off in quality.
(We’re choosing “The Departed” as a launching point because it was his best performance/character post-“Boogie Nights.”)
Wahlberg has appeared in dozens of movies since then, but you probably can count the amount of good performances on one hand: “The Fighter,” “Ted,” Lone Survivor” and “Deepwater Horizon.” His newest movie, “Instant Family,” is supposed to be decent — but we’ll see.
(And don’t come at us with “The Other Guys” — Will Ferrell was funny, but Walberg and his incessant “peacock” joke were horrible.)
Listen, we’re not knocking the guy for being a prolific actor. We’re just saying his movies aren’t that good. Furthermore, this perception of Wahlberg being a “hard-working Bostonian at heart” and a “good role model” needs to be reevaluated.
All that said, Wahlberg probably will play Brady in a movie some day, and said movie probably will make a bunch of money, especially in Boston. Whatever.
We pick Jude Law.
Thumbnail photo via Jim Brown/USA TODAY Sports Images